Below is a comment from one of the lessons in the Recovering Our Families course. Comments on the site are private, but Michelle allowed us to publish this one here.
I would like to say that this course is by far and absolutely the best and most helpful resource I have found in my 20 years of searching and trying. I was reluctant to write anything because unlike many of you I haven’t had a single aha moment; I haven’t been able to successfully put any of the suggestions into practice; my son and my family have been having the most horrifying and worst experiences we have had in the 20 years of his illness and every time I think it can’t possibly get worse…it does. That doesn’t sound like a very effective testimonial to this course, I know, but in fact I think it might be the most important testimonial for this course. Let me explain.
The only description I can come up with to describe what we have experienced, while I was simultaneously trying to take the Family Recovery course is, being in the bowels of hell with no relief in sight. (I would like to qualify that with, I am pretty tough and resilient and have been standing almost the entire 20 years of this experience, and so has my son…but this has brought me to my knees) Our experiences aren’t what’s important in what I am trying to convey so I won’t go into them. What I want to convey…
Even though I don’t even have the beginning of a recovery story to write here what I have to say is worth saying…and hearing. All of you who are parents will understand that as we raise our children even though we may not see the results of the values we try to instillin them as we are teaching them, those values show up in them at some point when we least expect them and we are overcome with pride (and surprise). Well, Krista (and others), I am that child and at some point I am going to surprise you with my ability to effectively use what I have learned here!
I have been unable to fall asleep at night after reading the materials and doing the worksheets because I am enraged at myself! I feel like the antithesis of the lessons! I often lay there thinking, “Well no wonder nothing has worked! I’ve been going about it all wrong for the last 20 years.” That mindset really got me STUCK! I am a person who believes everything has a purpose; every moment is a learning moment; nothing is irreversible; and I love the saying, “If your going through hell, keep going!”
I am walking away from this course with the tools that are going to help me get unstuck! Instead of beating myself up for the mistakes I can’t fix, I am going to accept what I can’t change and develop a “Growth” mindset. Maybe I’m not there yet but thanks to this course and all of you amazing and remarkable people, I have a direction with tools to get me there.”
Michelle, Mom of someone given a psychiatric diagnosis.